


Hulk Goes Looking

by Sapphy, SapphyWatchesYouSleep (Sapphy)



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Incredible Hulk - All Media Types
Genre: Adorable Hulk, Children's Stories, Clint Barton & Hulk Friendship, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-22
Updated: 2013-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-05 11:11:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1093207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sapphy/pseuds/Sapphy, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sapphy/pseuds/SapphyWatchesYouSleep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where's Jarvis? Is that Jarvis? That is Cap. He has a shield. He's not Jarvis.</p><p>Or</p><p>A story about Jarvis and Hulk and friendship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hulk Goes Looking

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know guys, I really don't. I was thinking about Hulk and J being friends, and next thing I was writing this demented bedtime story. I hope you like it!

Hulk is looking for the Voice.

 

His grasp of the past is shaky, but he is aware that in the time before now (not right now, but now in a more general sense) things weren’t as good. There had been lots of people trying to hurt Hulk and Bruce, and Bruce had lost his friends, and Hulk had never had any, and Bruce had been sad and scared all the time, and he’d hated Hulk.

 

Now Bruce still hated Hulk a bit, but not as much, and that was okay because Hulk hated Bruce a bit too. But Bruce was nearly happy a lot of the time now, and Hulk had two friends, which was more than he’d ever had before, even if he did have to share them with Bruce, and he has a team, which meant that when the people came to try and hurt Bruce and Hulk, then there would be people to help them fight back. This was all nice. These were things Hulk liked, and he wanted them to stay, not go away like Betty had.

 

Mostly when Bruce was happy, it was because he was with Metal Man and the Voice, so, Hulk reasoned, they must be the ones making all the good things happen.

 

Hulk knew Metal Man. He was a normal puny person really, but he wrapped himself up in shiny red metal so he would be tougher. They fought together lots, and he told Hulk well done when he smashed things, and sometimes he made things go bang, which was like smashing but for puny people in mental tins. Metal Man was Hulk’s friend, and he was only a little bit jealous that he was friends with puny Banner as well.

 

But the Voice Hulk doesn’t know. Sometimes if he’s in the tall building that smells like the team, he hears the Voice speaking, but he still hasn’t seen him. So he’s going looking.

 

Above him, in the ceiling, he hears the rattling noise that means that the Shooty Monkey is following him. Shooty Monkey says his name is Clint, which Hulk thinks is silly, but he accepts it because Shooty Monkey is his friend. Hulk thinks names should tell you what a thing is, like his does, but Shooty Monkey says human names don’t work like that. In general Hulk thinks humans are pretty stupid.

 

“Clint,” he rumbles, and then does it again because he likes how it sounds. “Clint.”

 

There’s a pause, and then Shooty Monkey’s face appears upside-down from in the ceiling.

 

“Hello Jade Jaws,” Shooty Monkey says, and he flips down from his hiding place and lands on Hulk’s shoulders. Shooty Monkey and Black and Red both like to ride on Hulk’s shoulders, and Hulk likes it when they do because then they’re safe, and they talk to him. Shooty Monkey talks very fast and laughs a lot, and tells him he’s doing good, and Black and Red shows him new things to smash. “Whatcha doing?”

 

“Bruce made a biiig bang, like Metal Man,” Hulk explains. “Now Hulk is looking for the Voice.”

 

“Why?” Clint asks, leaning his weight on the side of Hulk’s head. Hulk pokes him, but very gently, because Shooty Monkey is puny, and Hulk doesn’t want to break him.

 

“Bruce’s friend. Haven’t met him,” Hulk says. He starts to shrug, which is an expression he learnt from Black and Red which means that that is all his reasons, but then he remembers Clint is sitting on him, so he stops. “Is the Voice in the ceiling with you?” he asks, because it sounds like he’s in the ceiling when he talks, and Clint knows all about that.

 

“No,” Clint says, “he just talks from there. Through speakers, the way Tony talks to me during fights.”

 

Hulk nods. Little black dots in the teams’ ears that let them talk even when they’re a long way away. Like a phone, but not.

 

“Will ask the Team,” he rumbles, because one of them is bound to know, and Metal Man said that when there was something he didn’t understand, he should ask the Team and they’d help him.

 

“Good plan, big guy,” Shooty Monkey says, lifting himself up so he can grab onto the ceiling. He kicks it until there’s a neat square hole and hauls himself through. “I’ve got things to do, but let me know how it goes, okay?” he says, his voice already sounding distant.

 

Hulk grunts his ascent and goes to find the rest of the Team.

 

He finds Hammer Man next, in the Food Room.

 

“My friend,” Hammer Man booms happily, when he sees him. Hulk didn’t know that he was Hammer Man’s friend, but he doesn’t mind. Friends are good. “What brings you out on this peaceful day?”

 

“Looking for the Voice,” Hulk tells him, and Hammer Man nods. (His name isn’t really Hammer Man, but Shooty Monkey Clint says Hammer Man is a better name, and won’t tell him the other one).

 

“Aha,” Hammer Man says. “A difficult quest indeed. I too am puzzled by that strange phenomenon!”

 

Hammer Man uses words Hulk doesn’t know, but he understands that Hammer Man means he doesn’t know any more about the Voice that Hulk does.

 

“He’s not in the sky?” he asks, because the Voice comes from up, so if it’s not in the ceiling, then it must be in the sky, and Hammer Man can fly, so he knows all about the sky.

 

“I do not believe so,” Hammer Man says. “I believe he dwells somewhere in this building.”

 

“Shooty Clint says he’s not in the ceiling,” Hulk tells him.

 

“Indeed? Perhaps in the walls? There are many interesting things in the walls.” Hammer Man’s face goes pink. “I broke one, yesterday.”

 

He doesn’t sound pleased, so Hulk thinks it must not have been on purpose. “Bad smash,” he says, sympathetically. Smashing is good, but sometimes things smash when you don’t mean them to, and that’s very annoying.

 

“Well put, my friend,” Hammer Man says. He hits him on the back, and Hulk flinches, but Hammer Man had called him friend, and laughed, so he thinks it was meant to be a friendly hit. “As to your quest, perhaps you should ask the lady Natasha? She is well versed in all the secret ways and places of this tower.”

 

Natasha, Hulk knows, is the silly human name for Red and Black. Red and Black hasn’t said she’s his friend, not like Metal Man or Shooty Monkey or Hammer Man, but Hulk likes her. She’s quiet and she rides on his shoulder even though she’s scared, which is very brave, and she smashes things even though she’s puny and tiny and doesn’t have a metal suit.

 

He doesn’t know where to look for Red and Black, but on the wall outside the food room, there is a metal grill, like a little door, so he knocks on it.

 

There’s a scurrying noise, like a little mouse, and then the grill opens and Red and Black sticks her vivid head out.

 

“Hello Hulk,” she says. “You look serious.”

 

“Looking for the Voice,” Hulk tells her. “Hammer Man said it was in the walls.”

 

“Nothing in the walls except pipes and wires and secrets,” Red and Black tells him. “No Voice.”

 

“No Voice,” Hulk says sadly.

 

“Where have you looked?” Red and Black asks.

 

“Asked Shooty Clint about ceiling, and Hammer Man about sky and Red and Black about Walls,” Hulk tells her.

 

“Well,” Red and Black says, “You just need to think of what places you haven’t looked yet. You’ll find the Voice in the end, I’m sure.”

 

She shuts her little metal door, and Hulk sits down on the floor to think. He knows the Voice is in this tall building, because this is where he hears it. But it’s not in the walls, or the ceilings, or the roof. So then it must be… “Down,” Hulk rumbles, and goes to find some stairs.

 

At the very bottom of the stairs, lots and lots and lots of stairs, more tens than Hulk has fingers to count them on, he finds big blue doors, and behind the big blue doors is Cap, trying to smash a bag hanging from the ceiling. He’s not doing very well, the bag hasn’t fallen down or exploded or anything. Hulk wonders if he should help.

 

A cap is a sort of hat, Hulk knows this, but it is also the name of the not-so-puny man in blue who tells Team what to do. It is an even sillier name than Nat-Ash-Er.

 

“Hulk?!” Cap sounds surprised and not-pleased to see him, but that’s okay because Hulk has three whole friends, so he doesn’t need the Cap as well. “What are you doing out?”

 

“Science went BOOOOOOOOM,” Hulk says, enjoying the way the last word echoes around the room.

 

“Oh. Are you okay?” Cap is silly sometimes, but he is also kind, and Hulk likes kind people.

 

“Am Hulk,” he says, to reassure Cap. Nothing hurts Hulk. “Looking for the Voice.”

 

“The Voice?” Cap is very silly if he doesn’t understand. All the other team had understood.

 

“The Voice that talks to puny Bruce when he does science,” Hulk explains slowly. Cap is stupid and must have things explained very carefully. “And helps Metal Man with his metal things.”

 

“Oh!” Realisation dawns on Cap’s face. “You mean Jarvis.”

 

“Jar-Vis,” Hulk repeats. “Another silly human name.”

 

“Not really,” Cap says, looking surprised. “Tony, Metal Man, says it stands for Just A Really Very Intelligent System, so it’s really just a description.

 

That’s good. Hulk approves of names that tell you what a thing is. “Jaaaaar-Visss,” he says happily. “Hulk will find him.”

 

“Well he’s not in here buddy,” Cap says.

 

“Not up or down or outside or in the walls,” Hulk complains. “Hiding.”

 

“Why don’t you ask Metal Man,” Cap suggests. “He knows all about Jarvis.”

 

“Yes.” That’s a good idea. Metal Man is always with Jarvis.

 

“Do you want me to show you where Tony is?” Cap asks.

 

“Hulk find.” Hulk is good at finding people, especially Metal Man who smells of oil and fire and blue light and the gold stuff he drinks.

 

He follows his nose down more stairs, and through a wall that is in the way and doesn’t seem to have a door, until he comes to a big wall of windows, through which he can see Metal Man. He’s wearing human clothes instead of his red tin, and he’s talking to one of his machine people.

 

He see Hulk and waves his hands wildly and some of the windows move out of the way so Hulk can get into the room.

 

“Hello big guy,” Metal Man says, “I heard the bang. Physicists, eh? Can’t live without them, can’t stop them ripping holes in the fabric of reality. You exploring? I don’t remember ever giving you the tour. Have you met Dum-E?”

 

Metal Man talks very fast, and says lots of things, so it takes Hulk a minute to sort it all out in his head. “Dummy machine person,” he says.

 

Metal Man freezes for a second, and then a huge grin spreads over his face. “Exactly,” he says, sounding happy. “Machine person, exactly. Like you or me, only made of Metal. And dumb.”

 

“Dumb Dummy,” Hulk says, and is pleased that Metal Man, at least, understands how names are meant to work.

 

“So whatcha doing out and about? Can I help you with something?” Dumb Dummy is circling Hulk, looking at him with his tiny metal head and making whirring noises.

 

“Hello Dumb Dummy,” Hulk says. “Am Hulk. Am looking for Jaaar-viss.”

 

Dumb Dummy makes a little beepy noise, and Metal Man says, “That’s him saying hello back. He doesn’t know any words, not exactly. Why’re you looking for Jarvis?”

 

“Hulk have friends,” Hulk explains, crouching down so dumb Dummy can look at him better. “Shooty Clint and Hammer Man and Metal Man. Bruce know them. Bruce has friends. Metal Man and Jaaar-viss. Hulk not know Jaaar-viss.” He shrugs, because that is all his reasons, and dumb Dummy’s little head moves up and down in time with his shoulders.

 

“Good point,” Metal Man says. “Doesn’t seem very fair. J, introduce yourself! Where are you manners?”

 

“Clearly I take after you, sir,” the Voice says, and it comes from everywhere and nowhere. “Hello Mr Hulk, I am Jarvis. I am pleased to meet you.”

 

People aren’t often pleased to meet the Hulk, so that’s nice. But he’s still confused. “Where?” he asks, looking round the room. There’s another machine person, a little one, and lots of Metal Man’s tins, but nothing that looks like it might be Jaaar-viss.

 

“I am a machine person, like Dummy,” Jaaar-viss says. “But I am much cleverer, and I don’t have a body.”

 

“Talk,” Hulk insists. “Live in the tower. Must have body.”

 

“So sharp you’ll cut yourself, Mr Hulk,” Jaaar-Viss says. “I have a body, but it is… in lots of pieces, and those pieces are all over this tower, and some are elsewhere altogether.”

 

“Jaaar-viss is hurt?” Hulk asks. Hulk’s body has never been in lots of pieces, but sometimes people who he smashes are, and once Red and Black’s finger came off and she smelled like it hurt lots. The people in black who Metal Man doesn’t like stuck it back on, with their science magic, so it was okay, but Hulk had been worried. “Lots of pieces is hurt. Or smash. Did Hulk smash Jaaar-viss?” He doesn’t remember it, but memory is an unreliable guide to anything in Hulk’s experience.

 

“No Hulk, you did not smash me, and I am not hurt. It is simply how I am. My body is different from your body, just like your body is different from Dum-E’s body, or Mr Stark’s. We are all different in the Avengers.”

 

“Different bad,” Hulk says sadly. “Different makes people want to smash.”

 

Metal Man starts to say something, but Jaaar-viss speaks first. “Sometimes. People are scared of things they don’t understand. But being different isn’t bad. Everyone is different. Mr Stark and Miss Romanov and Mr Barton, for example.”

 

“Don’t know those people,” Hulk says. He knows Mr means a name, but he doesn’t know any Mr’s.

 

“Me and Shooty Monkey and Red and Black,” Metal Man explains.

 

“Exactly,” Jaaar-viss says. “Metal Man and Shooty Monkey and Red and Black are all humans, without genetic enhancement, but they are all different.”

 

“Shooty Monkey shoots, and Red and Black hides and stabs,” Hulk agrees. “And Metal Man is in a tin.”

 

Metal Man makes a surprised-cross noise, and Jaaaar-viss says, “Just so. They are all different. If the Avengers were all the same, it would be easy for enemies to smash them. But because you’re all different, you are hard to beat.”

 

“No one smashes team,” Hulk agrees. “So Jaaar-vis’s different body is good?”

 

“It makes him clever,” Metal Man explains. “Super clever. Even cleverer than me. Jarvis knows everything.”

 

Everything sounds like a lot to know. Hulk wonders where he keeps all the knowing. Maybe he has extra heads.

 

“Hulk not clever,” Hulk says. “Hulk not know anything except smash.” He cheers up as a thought comes to him. “But Hulk found Jaaar-viss.”

 

“You did,” Jaaar-viss agrees. “And now you have, if there’s anything you want to know, you can just say my name and ask me and wherever you are in the tower, I’ll help you.”

 

Helping is what friends do, Shooty Monkey had said. "Jaaar-viss is Hulk’s friend?” Hulk asks.

 

“Yes Mr Hulk. I am your friend.”

 

And Hulk is happy, because he found the Voice all by himself, and now he has four whole friends, and Bruce only has two. He thinks kindly that maybe, just maybe, he might be willing to share Hammer Man and Shooty Monkey with Bruce, since Bruce is sharing Metal Man and Jaaar-viss with him.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like this, why not come follow me on tumblr? I'm gluttonforpunsihment for fic recs and lentilswitheverything for my general fandom reblogging.


End file.
